Bi-Plane

Ok, so with the ordeal of a few weeks ago behind me, I’ve gone back to my daily routine of eat sleep work, with, thankfully, a nice dollop of play tossed in every now and again.

But I’m also desperately trying to hold on to that feeling of the past few weeks, the “I need to squeeze every ounce of life out of every second of every day” feeling. Because when you exist on that plane, everything is wonderful. I had a deep appreciation for the tiniest of things, and a careless indifference to things that used to make me insane. It may be the last time I see a duck feather float by on the water. It may be last time I smell that particular perfume. That may be the last temper tantrum I witness at the mall. Everything is taken in and enjoyed for what it is, the now. The sights, sounds and scents,  I wanted to slow it all down and appreciate all of it. I became brutally aware of how fast time slips past us, and how I’ve spent much of it floating mindlessly towards the next big thing on my schedule. Just trying to get by until I get there.  But I don’t want to be there, I want to be here!! (A little reverse Eckhart Tolle joke, Kelly’s laughing, trust me)

No, I have not yet read “The Power of Now”. I need to. I’ve watched some YouTube video’s of Tolle, and I’ve learned a lot from Kelly, but I always felt the right time to read that book would present itself. I suppose now it has.

Yet now that I am not fearing imminent death, it’s been a struggle to keep that feeling alive. I’ve been successful for the most part, but the world doesn’t always want to co-operate. For instance, every Monday, and tomorrow will be no different, someone will say something like “uuugh, Monday!, I hate Mondays!” or “Is it Friday yet?” Now I answer with something positive like “Yeah but the sun is shining!” to the first comment, or “But I had a great weekend, I don’t mind a little work till the next one.” to the second. I get looks, like I’ve taken one too many happy pills.  But I am not going to stop. I hope I rub off on a few people,  

So for the moment at least, I am able to exist on both planes. Or rather, I am able to exist on one, or the other. I have to function day to day, and yes the old habits of grumbling about little things still do creep up, but I am also able to call up that other plane and float on it much of the time. And it’s a much happier plane on which to live.